If roses are meant to be red

And violets to be blue

Why isn't my heart meant for you

My hands longing to touch you

But I can barely breathe

Starry eyes that make me melt

Right in front of me

Lost in this world

I even get lost in this song

And when the lights go down

That is where I'll be found

This music's irresistible

Your voice makes my skin crawl

Innocent and pure

I guess you heard it all before

Mister Inaccessible

Will this ever change

One thing that remains the same

You're still a picture in a frame

Lost in this world

I even get lost in this song

And when the lights go down

That is where I'll be found

I get lost in this world

I get lost in your eyes

And when the lights go down

That's where I'll be found

I get lost in this world

I get lost in your eyes

And when the lights go down

Am I the only one

I am excluded. in his life.

thrown. dump. an insult to his life. his memories. his history.  

I dont rock his world. no more. not anymore.  

When someone wants to do something nice for you Dont argue Dont resist Dont Say No Dont try to change their mind Just smile and say thank you and think about how fortunate you are to have generous people in your life

Have a cake. Celebrate Life :) I finished my coffee flavoured Swiss Roll. yummy ~

Aaqil: Intellectual; Wise. People with this name tend to be a powerful force to all whose lives they touch. They are capable, charismatic leaders who often undertake large endeavors with great success. They value truth, justice, and discipline, and may be quick-tempered with those who do not. If they fail to develop their potential, they may become impractical and rigid.

Mikhail: the name of Archangel Michael in the Qur'an and is known as the angel who brings sustenance and blessings to believers. It is also the Greek form of Michael and has Biblical origins with the meaning of Who is as God.

Tamimi: Strong and Solid. (Arabic: بنو تميم‎) is one of the largest of all Arab tribes. The tribe's history goes back to pre-Islamic times, a sister-clan of Quraysh. Today millions descend from the tribe in the Arabian Peninsula and neighboring countries such as Iraq ,Qatar, Jordan , Syria , Egypt , Palestine , Iran, Emirates and Afghanistan



I never write about you. so here it is.

Pregnant with you was soothing. A blessing. Enjoying most of your time here in me. Exclude the morning sickness, but some of it bring quite a memory. happy ones.

Labor. Alhamdulillah. You made it easy for me. While others have to fight for hours in labor. With you is only for few minutes. my baby, a fighter, a survivor.

Pantang. Arghhh seksa gile. The first few months I have to admit was suffering. Coping with the parenting. Adjusting with your existence. I guess everybody had it. I had problems milking you. Which end me up in depression. Here it begins. The sickness. Post-partum mood disorder. or Meroyan. Owh how i hate the terms. Your walid. was such a dear husband and father. Your careness got me through the period. It was not pleasant. But we survived. Thank You husband for your time.

To my Mikhail: I am sorry for having that feeling. For the depression. For the sickness. For neglecting you. For being such a lousy mother. For the divorce. For losing your walid. For ruining your life, your future. I hope one day, you'll forgive my wrongdoing. Im sorry baby. I really am.

This is my pledge for you. I ll make myself in a better health. I ll work hard for both of us. I ll stand for our rights. We gonna survive this cruel world. I ll make sure of that. For I love no one else but you. Just You.

 “That old saying, how you always hurt the one you love, well, it works both ways”

Last night. It was khamis malam jumaat. In the middle of the night. His crying was different. He was struggling to escape. From me. Your own Umi. I chant 'subhannallah' in his ear, then al-fatihah. He finally stop struggling. He touched my face and hug me. hard. and kisses. I cried. For thousands of reasons. Ya Allah, lindungilah hamba mu ini. Ujilah kami setakat yang kami mampu hadapi. How I wish .. if only I could.

Untuk Aaqil Mikhail:
Aku mencintaimu setulus hatiku. Aku menyayangimu dengan sepenuh jiwaku. Aku Mengasihimu sepanjang usiaku. Aku Menginginkanmu lebih dari apapun
Meski tak seindah yang kau mau. Tak sesempurna cinta yang semestinya. Namun aku mencintaimu. Sungguh mencintaimu.
Begitu erat begitu lekat. Perasaanku kepadamu. Tak bisa ku hentikan. Tak mampu ku tepiskan.

arghh. Live without posession and live without expectation. I cant possibly apply this to you. I posess only you. I expect only your love. and No One else.

My adorable, charming, brilliant, humourous and naughty little monster. How you can carry yourself with others make me superbly jealous. Make me feel that I am not needed. I ll bare with that. As you too, gonna leave me. one day. I ll get use to it.

“It's easy to cry when you realize that everyone you love will reject you or die.”

Excuse my English. nor Bahasa. both also hancur. grammar nor tatabahasa i know hell. heh. i passed my SPM already. who wud bother pun. Thank you readers for your time reading my shit. Appreciate it very much. 

Assalamualaikum.